Retail Observer

RETAILOBSERVER.COM AUGUST 2017 44 Libby Wagner Culture Coach Libby Wagner, author of The Influencing Option: The Art of Building a Profit Culture in Business, works with clients to help them create and sustain profit cultures www.libbywagner.com RO R ecently, I met up with some long-time clients whose industry is at the maelstrom of significant change. Funding and financing are uncertain. Their clientele is shifting. Their employees are concerned about job security. The current issues of the day, political and social, are having a practical and emotional impact on them. A question that comes up repeatedly for many organizations and every single leader I know is, how do we manage times of great change? A quick look on Amazon.com or at your favorite bookseller will provide a plethora of options for change management, change leadership, or just change. No system, acronym or top ten tips are going to give you what you really want. What you need right now is likely counterintuitive and might even feel impractical: radical self-care. Most of us are busy. Scheduled. Booked and triple-booked. Many people will sacrifice what they see as non-essential as they worship at the church of busy-ness: sleep, nutrition, exercise, time with others, even time with themselves. We talk about "work-life balance," and even though we desire it, crave it, it's kind of a myth; we don't balance anything because our days are forever unpredictable and changing themselves. What we need to be able to do is to show up in our conversations and interactions with the presence and focus that these tumultuous times demand. If we are sleep-deprived, emotionally exhausted, or detached from those we love, we have very little from which to draw upon to manage the stressors that consistent change brings. If this isn't a current practice of yours, then it's likely to bring up two primary responses: the logistics of it (How can I possibly make time for self-care when I don't have time to deal with my outrageous to-do list?) and, the desire for it (Could I really go to bed earlier? Could I really schedule a massage or have an agenda-less hour to go for a walk?) Nike already captured the best advice with regards to the above: Just do it. But it's more than that . . . you often have to give yourself permission for radical self-care. And, it's radical because it doesn't make sense, and no one else is doing it. It's radical because many of us have bought into the idea that we don't deserve it or that we are unworthy of it. And if that doesn't resonate with you, then I invite you to check your relationship with perfectionism — that's just worthiness in disguise. Here are some suggestions to consider, but make your own list, as only you know your edges for self-care radicalism! • Schedule a massage, acupuncture or other healthy treatment for your body. We forget that our bodies are holding us, carrying us and sustaining us, especially when we are busy. • Schedule a walk (or movement) in a place that you love, like a park, garden, beach or street. Even if it's just 30 minutes, engage your senses by being present on the walk: don't talk on the phone or even listen to music, if you can do it! • Manage your intake of news, social media and information. If you can do an experiment for a week, shift your focus and say "yes" to yourself rather than "yes" to the world at large. Rejuvenating your spirit. • Acknowledge your feelings, especially grief and loss. This this emotion ranges from the smallest disappointment to the grandest trauma. Unexpressed grief and loss are the painful foundation for illness, stress, and many other psychological ailments. Get the support you need from trusted confidant or therapist. • Reframe when possible. Seeing challenges as opportunities doesn't mean you take a spiritual by-pass of what's happening (see the above point), but it does mean that you can begin to reframe how you might deal with a stressful or unavoidable situation. • Hold the vision for yourself and others. Keep the end in mind. Whether it's a project, a company, a program, stay connected to the ideal vision of it, remind yourself why and what's the purpose of what you are doing. Connecting with purpose is life-sustaining. • Spend time with people who matter to you. Every artistic tradition in every culture reminds us to focus on what matters, and what matters is love. Whether it's beloved friends, a partner or spouse, a child or a pet with which we connect; we are not meant to be solitary characters floating in time and space. Recently, I enjoyed an On Being interview with Krista Tippet and poet Marie Howe, who were talking about poetry and things that matter to them. Marie Howe asked the question, "Which face is the one I gaze into the most?" We all held our collective breaths because we all knew it was the iPhone or some other technology, the things that tie us to our busy-ness, not to the ones we love. Maybe the smallest, most radical act might be just that: to gaze into another face more often. A RADICAL APPROACH TO DEALING WITH CHANGE

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