Retail Observer

RETAILOBSERVER.COM DECEMBER 2020 48 G eorge had a business degree, but his sweet spot was selling ridiculously expensive athletic shoes to professional basket- ball players. George was an associate at Nordstrom, and he had a special knack for having just the right pair of Nikes or Adidas waiting when a star player arrived. And they rewarded him handsomely. "He was making a healthy six-figure income," Ralph said. "Then the pandemic hit." Overnight, George's professional life as he knew it was over. Nordstrom closed the store where George worked. Today he's out of a job. Does that make him a victim? A loser? Or a man who's ready to use that business degree? To a surprising extent, that's up to George. The story he tells himself will go a long way toward influencing what happens next. Too many of us have found our once-comfortable professional lives upended or dashed. Anyone who feels secure probably isn't paying attention. We're left with the question of how to navigate a new landscape. Of the tools available to help you chart a new life course, there's one that is free, familiar and proven. It's your personal narrative. Researchers have studied how the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and what's happening to us have a direct bearing on our emotions, actions, and outcomes. "Narrative psychology" is grounded on the human impulse to construct stories to make sense of our experiences. Starting in early childhood, we create a narrative where we're the central character – defined by our experiences with parents, siblings, and schoolmates, and informed by what they tell us about who we are. As we grow, our story becomes a cornerstone of our identity. "When I ask myself 'Who am I?' I'm asking how to shape the story of my life so that it hangs together in a meaningful well- rounded whole," says Elisabeth Camp, a professor at Rutgers. Narratives help us grow by providing a framework for envisioning a complete life and gauging our current progress against our broad goals and dreams. But you must be in touch with and in control of your story. Odds are it's happening outside of your direct consciousness, even though your mind is obsessed with it. Here are a few quick ways to harness the power of your inner narrative and reset your world view and outcomes. DISCOVER YOUR INNER VOICE Anyone who's tried meditation knows the hardest part is dealing with the endless stream of worries, dreams, passions and fears that dominate the mind. Mindfulness is the art of stepping away from the chatter of the "monkey mind" and observing the workings of your brain without judgement. The better you get at it, the more you can tone down the chatter. Research shows it not only reduces stress but rewires the brain in ways that enable us to respond creatively to people and circumstances. You'll also learn to spot the narratives you are spinning about yourself, and to yourself, as they happen, and recast them in a clear and conscious way. DEAL WITH YOURSELF OBJECTIVELY Psychologist Ethan Kross ran a red light one day and heard himself say aloud, "Ethan, you idiot!" Intrigued, he conducted groundbreaking research on personal narratives, finding that the inner monologues people spin have a huge impact on their success. A simple switch to addressing yourself in the third person – using your name instead of "I" or "me" – adds a psychological distancing that helps you view yourself in a less emotional, judgmental way. Make a practice of recording your positive experiences and feelings daily. A "gratitude journal" can be a life-changer. BE KIND "You are your own worst enemy." How many times have you heard this? Humans have a "negativity bias," that leads us to spend more time dwelling on our unfortunate experiences than the positive. It's a major liability when we're looking to rewrite our life story. Try to imagine that what's happening to you is happening to someone you love – a partner, child or sibling. We naturally nurture, coach and encourage these people, viewing their problems as opportunities for growth and learning. Take control of your narrative – whether it's long or short, and serves as a springboard or a boat anchor is up to you. YOUR STORY, YOUR FUTURE Mario Juarez Business Mindset RO Mario Juarez is an organizational consultant, coach, and motivational speaker. He focuses on helping organizations and individuals achieve better business results through strategic storytelling. An award-winning former journalist, Mario led a series of innovative communications initiatives at Microsoft before founding his company, StoryCo, which serves clients across a range of industries.

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